Waiting Room

This blog is coming to you live from my therapist’s waiting room.

It’s a bit of a dated term, isn’t it? We don’t have to do much “just plain waiting” these days: we can catch up on our Facebook feed, text our niece for her birthday, check out next week’s weather – or even write a post for our blog!

I’m alone in this room, but I can hear the patient who’s currently with the therapist. She’s sobbing loudly. I’m not trying to hear her, and I’m certainly not eavesdropping, but there’s no escaping the sound. It’s quite distressing. I wonder whether her session will finish on time, or run over? I wonder how my therapist will be, afterwards? He’s always very professional, very detached. I assume he’ll be OK, and have the energy to listen to me next. I wonder whether he treats all his patients the same? I know how he reacts if I start crying.

The sound has died away now. I hope she’s feeling better and is able to leave her session relieved of whatever burdens she brought with her.

I would like to go in there and cry today, but I suspect I’m too numb. I can’t feel the emotional intensity which is appropriate to the events of this week. I know how I could feel, but I’m not experiencing it – at least, not on a level where I’m conscious of it. 

My turn soon. The sobber has left, looking more or less composed.

I wish I could cry with such abandon, and leave looking as together as that.

2 Comments

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2 responses to “Waiting Room

  1. I think of that somethings… how is the therapist handling everything? I’ve seen some glimpses into the personal life of my therapist, and it just goes to show how sometimes I forget they too are people with emotions. I say to myself I could not do what they do, but then again, how many times have I offered a shoulder to cry on? All I know, is bless them for what they do.

    Anyway, just a side thought from your thought, dunno why that came up as it’s so loosely connected.

    Hope you can break though that numb. But even not, keep up the battle. You’re not alone! ❤

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    • Thank you so much 🙂 You know how much I appreciate your support, in particular, but it can never be said too often – so, Nikeyo, I *really* appreciate your support!

      I once had a psychiatrist who let me into his private life a little too much. Nothing unethical, but just a blurring of the lines. It did not work out well. I am now a huge advocate of boundaries. My experience with him (he had to stop work suddenly, which had a devastating impact on me, and when I saw him some months later he admitted he’d reached a point where he could no longer work) has made me very appreciative of professional boundaries. It also made it quite difficult for me to trust that professionals will in fact take care of themselves, which isn’t good, because most of them in fact DO take care of themselves, and I don’t need to worry about it …

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