A New “F” Word

Flexibility. Flexibility. Flexibility.

As I wrote a post earlier today, I was firmly embedded in the “I am a Failure” narrative. Unfortunately, you could say I was Fixed there. Firmly Fixed. Disappointingly, it took me some time to find perspective, to realize I’d become stuck in a bad place.

Because, of course, the Failure story is just another tale my mind told me. My dear old mind has learnt this story very well, so it just takes a tiny trigger to set off the whole Failure avalanche.

I can get myself unstuck – but at the moment it takes a while.

Here’s the process, using today’s Failure story as an example:

  1. I acknowledged that I was in the grip of the Failure story. (No mean feat – she’s a persistent one!)
  2. I intellectually acknowledged that perhaps the Failure story is just one of the many stories my mind could be telling me. (Emotionally, I couldn’t feel that, but I could acknowledge it as a logic possibility.)
  3. Through sheer dint of effort, I remembered a time when my mind was telling me a different story. Today, I remembered a conversation with my therapist yesterday afternoon.
  4. I relived parts of that conversation; this is where the exercise moved from being purely intellectual to engaging the emotions.
  5. Finally, I could both know and feel differently about the Failure story – I’d escaped its grip.

Does anyone else have favourite stories their mind likes to tell them? And how do you break their grip?

Failure

1 Comment

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One response to “A New “F” Word

  1. Now if I can only get Fixed on the Flexibility habit Faster!

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